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if you were wondering what happens when (doesn't allow the letter E) meets (only allows the letter E):

terrible people, comic violence 

For example, we don't federate with k*w*f*rms any more, as of about 4.5 seconds after I found out they have a fediverse instance.

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Welcome, new folks! The federated timeline is getting a lot busier and more fun today, since you've been finding interesting people to follow.

If you see objectionable content on the timeline, please take the time to report it. You get to choose whether to forward your report to the instance the content came from. If an instance seems sketchy (or you don't care to look at it), just keep the report local and I'll decide whether to yeet the offending instance into the sea.

I'm planning to move Sandwich's status/outage updates away from the birdsite, ideally to something with an API and that people can subscribe to. But the SaaS options seem weirdly expensive or half-baked, and none of the open source options are actively maintained. Recs?

listen, i'm glad everyone is here/back but platform metacommentary alone won't be enough to make this stick. you need to start posting inane nonsense

what did you eat today. did you see any cool bugs

will be offline from 13:00 UTC - ~16:30 UTC today. Sorry about the trouble! A Mastodon security patch will be coming out during the very early morning in my time zone.

A couple of changes to today:

Self-service registrations are closed because of a huge influx of spambots - but we'll happily give invitations to anyone, and any registered user can invite others.

We're spinning up the full-text search feature! It'll be available shortly.

Hi, folks! I've updated the terms of service. They now incorporate Sandwich's master terms of service.

I've made some major updates to the infrastructure. You'll hopefully see better performance. Enjoy!

I've been banning the "watch blah free online" spammers' local accounts, but they're still all over the federated timeline. Working on some strategies to screen signups, but spam filtering the fediverse is going to be tougher.

We're joining many other companies to urge @AjitPaiFCC to reconsider his attack on net neutrality. The @FCC must stop ignoring public and expert input in favor of cable/telco lobbyists, and it must stop ignoring attacks on its rulemaking process.

Apologies to everyone I had to leave out! (your instances are great too)

From Witches to Dolphins, These Are the Communities That Make Mastodon Great #eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

"What we need is to come up with a centralised brand strategy for the OStatus network, in order to attract the sort of people who respond to branding, because network growth is important."

Woah. Back that train of thought right back in to the station and decommission the locomotive.

Welcome, local folks - thanks for choosing for your tooting needs!

Since we're a small server and Mastodon is decentralized, our "Local timeline" isn't as busy as big servers like

Our "Federated timeline" shows toots from each user across the fediverse (i.e. all Mastodon servers) who is followed by someone here on this server.

Please make interesting toots, and follow interesting people across the fediverse, to make both our timelines awesome!

Mastodon Sandwich

The social network of the future: No ads, no corporate surveillance, ethical design, and decentralization! Own your data with Mastodon!